This is an answer for the c# bindings, I guess you're using the java bindings but it should almost be the same.
First you should start the selenium server on the remote selenium server using the selenium-server-standalone-2.0b3.jar found here: http://code.google.com/p/selenium/downloads/list
You start it using:
java -jar selenium-server-standalone-2.0b3.jar
In your test you use the RemoteWebDriver like this:
var desiredCapabilities = DesiredCapabilities.Firefox();
var selenium = new RemoteWebDriver(new Uri("http://seleniumserver1:4444/wd/hub"), desiredCapabilities);
That should make sure your testscripts send all webdriver commands to the remote server.
Grid 2.0 should be in selenium 2.0 beta 4 making it easier to use both selenium servers. ( I guess now you could switch server urls by yourself )